(fiction posting -- I'm a writer; it's allowed)
From an early age Scott No. 53 knew he wanted to be an only child. His parents, however, did not consult him when they had his brother thirteen months later. Old enough to walk and wandering around the kitchen Scott No. 53 managed to get a hold of a long handled meat fork, and carried it over to the other end of the kitchen where the baby bassinet was set up holding the only sibling he had to contend with at the time. His mother turned around horrified to see Scott No. 53 blindly poking the meat fork into the baby basinet.
Scott No. 53 still contends that life would have been easier if they had stopped after him. Instead they had five more. His attempt to remedy the situation with a meat fork was unsuccessful.
About seventeen years later Scott No. 53 and first brother were fist fighting about something. This started in the kitchen, and lead out of the kitchen, and into the living room and then they fell in the coat closet. The whole time their 4’10” mother was beating them indiscriminately with a broom yelling: “Stop it! Get off of him! Stop it!” Ten year old little sister was following their mother around crying buckets of tears, certain that one of them was going to kill the other and if that failed their mom was going to kill them both with the broom.
In retrospect little sister claimed it was a very traumatic experience for her. Scott No. 53 just nodded at her remark and repeated his request to be an only child which he has now missed by forty-some years.
